The Self Serve Story

Self Serve is a sex-positive alternative to the old-school adult store.

To end the shame and silence around sex, we aim to help people to see their bodies and desires as beautiful, sexual, positive, strong and healthy. We create unique spaces for fun and learning, helping our customers learn about healthy sexuality in a safe, supportive environment.

Historically, adult retail shops and websites have been far from tasteful, often relegated to back alleys and filled with tacky, harmful & exploitative products. These adult sex toy stores foster a culture of shame and unrealistic ideas about sex. Unlike these shops, Self Serve provides a positive, educational and empowering shopping experience. We provide floor models of every item we carry, so you know more about the intimate toys you’re about to enjoy.

A virtual introduction to the store:

Self Serve is a woman-owned sexuality resource center & boutique.

In a culture where sex is sensationalized and unrealistically represented in the media, and silenced in day-to-day life, we offer a space that is frank, honest and friendly. Our compassionate and non-judgmental sex educators give you the space to ask the questions that make other people blush.

With the help of family and friends, co-founders Matie and Molly opened Self Serve in January 2007 in the Upper Nob Hill neighborhood of Albuquerque, New Mexico. Matie Fricker and Molly Adler had taught sex ed and sold sex toys for years. They decided it was high time to collaborate and create their own fabulous store for people who know, deep down that sex is not a naughty, bad thing, but actually the way to a much happier life of pleasure.

The Self Serve staff love to educate community members, sell toys and safer sex supplies, teach workshops, host toy parties, and uphold high standards for quality and comprehensive sex education. When it comes to pleasure, Self Serve takes a holistic approach. In addition to sex toys & safer sex supplies, the shop offers gourmet chocolates, books, movies, cards, body treats, bachelorette gifts, massage oils, grooming supplies and gifts.

Our shop is located on historic Route 66, and features a retro-modern design complete with a silver glitter vinyl couch.

Why We Do It…

At the shop, at sex toy parties, and in our workshops, we quickly learned that people need to tell their secrets—secrets that when left untold foster more secrecy and shame. We realized that there are too few forums for communication and problem-solving that address these so-called “bedroom secrets” outside the bedroom. In today’s world, where doctor’s appointments last 15 minutes and medical school coursework rarely covers sexuality, we recognized a compelling need for safe, thorough, healthy advice and resources on sex without all the pop culture hype and anti-woman imagery.

Customers representing the diversity of human experience have shared with us their most intimate pleasures and fumbles. Women in their 50s have turned to us to find the right book, erotica, toy or knowledge of her own body to find the first of many orgasms. Couples see us about sexual problems they have shared with no one else. New moms acknowledge they still want to have great sex, but maybe not just yet. Transwomen and men find community or supplies. Survivors of sexual assault share their stories and begin to feel good about sex again. Every individual who shares her story becomes stronger and more confident. We love being a part of that process.

We don’t like the word “sexpert,” but we want every grown-up to feel she can be her own expert. There are no universal truths, except that you are an individual with your own distinctive needs, desires and feelings. We want to help you find your own truths.

Check out our reviews on Yelp.

Self Serve is Different

We care about your safety, your joy and your privacy.

We will never share your information with anyone, and we ship in discreet packaging.  We will never add you to any email list automatically or without your consent.

Your Safety

Much of the adult industry remains unregulated, and a wide variety of products and product additives in the marketplace have been proven harmful to your health. We at Self Serve stock only those products made with bodysafe ingredients and materials. We provide a Self Serve Care & Maintenance Guide with every product you purchase.

Your Joy

We support the right for women and men to explore the intense capacity for joy with which we as human beings have been uniquely endowed. You have the right to sexual joy in every relationship, including your relationship with yourself.

Your Privacy

We will never sell, trade or distribute your name, contact information, or any other personal information to any company or organization. We ship discreetlyand make sure all personal information is confidential. We take our privacy policy very seriously.

We Care About Our Community

We offer sexuality workshops that promote health, joy, safety and fulfillment. We provide space for community groups to gather. We work in cooperation with and regularly donate to community organizations that share our philosophy in supporting women’s health, sexual wellness and LGBT rights.

Our staff has been trained to refer customers to sexuality resources online or locally.

We Care About Our Employees

We are committed to providing our small, highly trained staff of competent professionals with a safe, fulfilling and respectful work environment in which they may prosper.

Self Serve is a sex positive alternative to the old-school adult store. We believe sex is healthy and pleasure is good for you. We care about our customers and building community. Self Serve is a guilt-free, shame-free environment for women and men to learn about enhancing relationships and sexual happiness. Self Serve is different.

  • We support everyone seeking healthy, positive sexual attitudes and perspectives, and sensual pleasure in everyday life.
  • We strive for an eco-friendly ethic and offer you body-safe products.
  • We care about your safety, health and privacy.
  • You’ll find sex tips and advice.
  • You’ll always know how to care, feed and maintain your sex toys.